New Year’s Eve, 2019
I sat in a dim and spartan hotel room, about two thousand metres above sea level.
We were holidaying in Taiwan, and for this leg of our trip, we spent a night up in the famous Alishan mountains. We arrived on New Year’s Eve. The plan was to sleep super early, wake up in the wee hours of the morning, and then take a train to the lookout. There, we would wait to witness the first sunrise of the New Year. Hatsuhinode, as the Japanese call it.
Unfortunately, we could not feel as excited as we wanted to be. We were in various degrees of sick. My Dad had it worst. He had been ill for several days and the medicine he took did not help a lot. I watched as he tossed and turned in bed, coughing away. My Mum, lying next to him, was not having a restful sleep either.
I sat up in bed. 11.40pm. I had woken up way earlier than we were supposed to. I worried about my parents and wished my brother was here with us. But he was eight time zones away, doing a post-graduation work stint.
Since I was awake, I decided to count down to midnight by myself. I went to the bathroom, took some medication for my skin, and waited. If we were back in Singapore, we would be gathering around the TV to watch the New Year countdown live. We would chant “Ten, nine, eight …” along with the TV hosts and watch as fireworks go boom. Then we’d wish each other Happy New Year before going to sleep.
But this time was different.
This was the loneliest and quietest countdown I ever had.
Then I remembered my little daily prayer. The one I say under my breath, to myself, while looking up at the night sky. I looked out the window into the depths of the cold winter night. I murmured,
“Thank you for all the good things that happened in 2019. I’m grateful, and I’ll continue to do my best.”
That comforted me. So what if my 2019 was not going to end with a joyous bang! Many good things happened to me throughout 2019. It was the year I took concrete steps to take care of myself.
I returned to my bed and watched the time on my mother’s smartphone.
11.58pm.
11.59pm.
12.00am.
I smiled and whispered to myself,
“Happy New Year.”
New Year’s Day, 2020
A few hours later, my Mum woke me up.
Outside, people were up and about, heading to the train station like us. I read more about hatsuhinode while the train rumbled up the mountain. According to tradition, watching the first sunrise of the year brings good luck.
Would it, really? I consider myself spiritual, but not religious. I believe that how the year would turn out depends a lot on my attitudes and actions. But I also realise that luck plays a role too. For matters that are beyond my control, like luck, I appeal to the universe. Put my wishes out there and hope for the best, knowing that I’ve done all that I could.
The walk from the train station to the lookout was steep. Definitely not the most enjoyable thing to do so early in the morning. I looked up, and was astonished to find a sky full of stars. Way more stars than I usually see in Singapore. A wave of comfort washed over me. I think of the stars as my friends. I don’t always see them at night, but I know that they are up there, watching over me.
A small crowd had already gathered by the time we reached the lookout. The sky was still dark, except for a faint glow above the mountains on my right. All that was left to do was to wait for about a couple more hours.
I watched the light grow brighter and the stars fade into the sky. Dawn crept up on us in a warm embrace. I thought this was when I could say my wishes for the year, so I whispered them while staring at the golden horizon.
This was it. I had experienced the first dawn of the New Year and it was lovely. Time to head down now for breakfast, and then a bit more sleep. Or was there anything else…?
An excited murmur swept through the crowd. The sun was peeking ever so slightly over the mountain tops. All of a sudden, it rose. It fully emerged from behind the mountains, a blazing yellow ball, and shone fiercely. The crowd roared with delight.
It was over.
I stared into the azure morning sky and repeated my wishes. What a beautiful way to begin the year. Up here in the mountains, basking in the morning light, I felt brave. Like I could take on the world.
I smiled and whispered to myself,
“Happy New Year.”
Leave a Reply